Edwin Lyngar

On Writing and Culture

Keep Religion Out of Schools

Click here to visit the new Armchair Blasphemy podcast on my newest site: armchairblasphemy.com This week’s podcast is a discussion of a recent editorial that I wrote for the Reno Gazette Journal that will be published on March 5.  The piece disects a particularly awful law being considered in the Nevada legislature that would privilege religion in public schools.  Lot’s more to follow, so sign up over there.

My Colonoscopy: A Love Story

Caution: Do no read this, unless you have the sense of humor of a 12-year-old.  Also, every word of this is true:

I had to get my butthole snaked and probed.  I had some gut issues, and they wanted to make sure everything was okay.  Spoiler: It’s all fine.  But one of the gifts of middle age is that your asshole is no longer a private matter.  The doctor is always, “how’s the asshole Mr. Lyngar? Is your cock working okay?” and “why are you so fat?”  I am paraphrasing, but these are the questions one must answer as routine after hitting 40 or so.  Continue reading

A Baker’s Dozen

Salon just published my latest essay, suggesting that the left needs to learn how to fight dirty.  There was a lot of mixed reaction to the piece.  Some people seem to love it, and some are incensed.  I’ve been getting that a lot lately.  Setting aside the reactions to this particular piece, the big deal for me on this one is that it makes thirteen essays published in Salon in as many months.

The year 2014 was a big year for publishing.  The temptation is to keep retreading the same ground, but I want to continue to cover new topics.

If anyone has any suggestions for pieces or good insider news, let me know!

Boating Safety (or lack of such) in Honduras

On my vacation to Roatan, Honduras, almost no one wore life jackets and few boats even carried them.  This fellow (below) had zero life jackets aboard. When I tried to talk to him about it, he just kept pointing out that this boat was named “Trust Me.”  He was almost insulted that I asked.

Trust Me

Trust Me

When I insisted on putting life jackets on my children on the water taxis there, they were only ill-fitting type two jackets.  Continue reading

Year End Comes Again – News Update

I’ve had a banner year for writing and publishing this year.  I’ve had twelve pieces on Salon with two more expected next week (Christmas week).  You can follow my writer’s page there.  I have been consistently surprised by the level of interest generated by Salon.com, and I plan to continue to write for them in the New Year.

For those who followed ArmchairBlasphemy, my previous blog, I have take that completely off the web.  It now redirects to this site.  I had almost 100 short essays and posts, but many were done quick and early in my writing process.  There was a lot of great content on there but also things I wanted to revise with more thought and detail.  I will be re-posting the best hits of that site onto this one in the new year.

Also in the new year, I plan to add some pod-casting segments to this site.  I’ve done some pod-casting for my day job.  I have started to really enjoy it and there seems to be an untapped demand for this kind of content.  Don’t forget to follow me on Twitter, and watch for new, exciting content in 2015.

Is Bill O’Reilly Chickenshit? Take My Unscientific Poll.

Bill O’Reilly is trying to terrify people about about Ebola and ISIS.  This follows his shrieking paranoia over girl scouts, atheists, Christmas and Beyoncé.  Nothing is too inane to gin up terror among the ill informed.  Issues like Ebola and terrorism are both real problems in the world, yet the numbers don’t lie: Americans dead from Ebola: 1, Americans per day from gun violence: 86. Also, for perspective more than 30 thousand people a year are killed in car accidents.

As part of his fear-mongering extravaganza, Bill asks inane, leading questions of viewers and directs them to “unscientific polls” that he then uses to support his own stupid, flawed and flaccid arguments.  I intend to write an essay about Bill’s penchant for cowardice for Salon, but I need data that only very unscientific polls can provide.  Take My Poll Below, and feel free to refresh the page and take the poll as many times as you like, because like Bill, I’m running a meaningless survey to support my preconceived opinion:


A Letter To Abby’s English Teacher

My 14-year-old, high school freshman, Abby, asked me to write a letter to her English teacher for extra credit.  I was supposed to describe Abby to help the teacher gain some insight into teaching her.  Abby was pleased with the result, so I thought I’d share it.  She gave me permission to do so.

To Whom It May Concern:

Abby is equal parts intellectual and accessible. She’s outgoing, even dramatic, but at the same time reserved. I predict she will spend a lifetime confusing her friends and love interests but will remain at the top of everyone’s lists for being interesting and fun.

A recent picture of the Abby in question.

A recent picture of the Abby in question.

More than any “hobby,” I would define Abby by her love of reading and books. When she was in second and third grades, we had to monitor her book intake to ensure she did other activities. When she was in sixth grade, she read to the neglect of all else. When we tried to stop her, she smuggled books with the seriousness and rage of a Mafioso moving liquor during prohibition. People throw around the word “insatiable,” but Abby’s desire for the written word was (and remains) unquenchable. I am jealous of this trait in her.

Abby loves her family, but she never quite knows how to relate to those closest to her. She is neither “tomboy” nor “princess.” She is not a jock or a dweeb. She seeks an easy stereotype even as it eludes her. More than any other young person I know, I haven’t the foggiest idea of what kind of adult Abby will become. I believe that her voracious pursuit of knowledge coupled with a profound desire to do good will ultimately lead her to something meaningful.

Unlike many other parents, I care less about how Abby will make a living than how she will form relationships with others. Abby has read enough books to understand the superficiality of our species. She can walk among us, but struggles to form lasting friendships outside family.

Abby is expressive to the edge of manic and can flaunt her dramatic self. She likes being in front of people, to act and sing. Sometimes she’s reluctant to embrace her inner Shakespearian, but she should always opt to do so when inspired. The more she feels free from the conventions and petty judgments of adolescence, the more entertaining she becomes.

Abby has expressed various interests in Anime, music and video games, but her pop culture interests are fleeting. By contrast, she has shown an innate and growing curiosity about social justice. She’s outraged over things she cannot change (yet) and can’t bear the idea of suffering. The world needs more people like Abby.

English class is a fantastic place for Abby to explore her growing capacity for critical thinking. Sadly for the instructor, you can cajole and threaten Abby until your voice fails, but Abby will only embrace the lesson when she’s damn good and ready.

Love her with a passion. Teach her at your peril.

Audio and Reflection on Jesse Lee Peterson appearance

I went back on the Jesse Lee Peterson show last week to discuss my latest piece in Salon. My first appearance several months ago was just awful, but this time, it went great.  I did more than hold my own.  Between my first and second appearance, I learned that you can’t engage Peterson in an “honest” discussion.  Rather you must fight, argue, scream and claw to make your points.  It’s the sad reality of rightwing talk radio. For those who do not know Peterson, here are two of his top hits:

1. Peterson has seriously questioned whether women should vote.

2. Although an African American himself, he’s proposed that blacks return to the plantation to “learn to work” (I confronted him on this statement).

Peterson is an odious fellow, and I feel conflicted about going on his show.  I feel like I might be contributing to the dumbing down or coarsening of society.  I don’t think we should treat misogyny and racism as legitimate positions in a pluralistic society.  I plan to write a longer essay on my experience, but listen to the latest and decide for yourself if I made the right call.

The Pitfalls of Political Writing

I’ve had another piece run in Salon. This one is titled: I was poor, but GOP die-hard. Check it out.

The work of publishing so many political pieces made me reflect on the experience. I write a 12-step guide for the uninitiated:

The dozen steps of publishing a Salon article:
1. Two to three weeks: agonize and rewrite.
2. Send to editor, sit on hands for 72 hours praying to gods you don’t believe in.
3. Send a kindly reminder note when you can’t take it anymore.
4. Salon asks for naked pictures of you to go with the piece.
5. Salon piece hits, usually while you are sleeping.
6. First 6 hours: Friends and regular salon readers say nice things and share it. Warm kindness and reason ensue.
7. Get 200 new twitter followers.
8. Hour 7: World Net Daily and other conservative / lunatic sites see the piece and re-post it.
9. lengthy diatribes show up on Salon comment board claiming that you are lying about every single word.
10. someone calls you an asshole on twitter.
11. You get 3 or 4 e-mails that are as long as the original article, some very nice and some beyond insane.
12. The whole thing fades away, and you are left on the roadside naked and bruised, while everyone else has moved on with their lives.

Despite the sometimes painful parts, I’m loving the hell out of it.  Follow my work on Salon.

Salon Runs Another Article, Check It Out

Salon ran a piece I wrote on Cliven Bundy on April 17, which was coincidentally my birthday. This marks the fourth piece I’ve written for Salon AND the fourth piece that generated thousands of likes and shares.  I feel good about the solid response I’ve gotten from writing for Salon.  I can’t understand why, but my first four pieces really hit a nerve.

This latest piece shows the continued fascination people have about one goofy douchebag in a Stetson.  I’m tired of his antics. Read the whole piece below, but the long and short is that this person doesn’t recognize the authority of the United States.  I can’t understand how or why so many right wingers can continue to defend, essentially, a traitor.  Here’s the piece:

Fox News’ demented poster boy: Why angry rancher Cliven Bundy is no patriot: The right’s new fixation: An angry old white man who thinks freedom means not having to follow the law

The latest right-wing media poster-victim, Cliven Bundy, is just the latest in a long line of desert dwellers who thinks he or she should not have to follow the law and has a god-given right to unlimited use of public resources, in this case, rangeland.  I know the mentality well, because I grew up in rural Nevada and clung desperately to such beliefs until only a few years ago … Read the piece on Salon.


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